November 2012- Thankful

 The Felker Family at Thanksgiving.

This month Havah reentered the world of independence! She has driven by herself, picked up her kids from school (and mine), run errands, brushed her teeth without sitting down, and emptied the dishwasher without taking 3 breaks. She went to a Kindergarten Thanksgiving performance, she got the kids ready and made it to church on time, and went to Costco by herself! She went to a bacholorette party and walked down the aisle and stood as our baby sister got married!! She was able to enjoy herself at the wedding although her dancing skills were at a minimum...

These things that she (and all of us probably) had taken for granted are all signs of recovery. She is thankful.

This has been a good month. Her foot still swell, gets discolored, and hurts but it's so much better.

She wants to thank everybody who pitched in to bring dinners and helped her out in October & November when Tim was gone. She's so grateful!

Our younger sister's wedding December 1st
A new start for us all !

Keep up those prayers for my sister's heart as she physically heals and feels like she's missing a little guy who'd be turning 4 months on Sunday. Leaving the house wondering what she forgot and realizing she is missing her baby who isn't here. XXOO

November 11, 2112 Watch out World!

After a very emotional week we have a major success...Havah drove for the first time since August! Today she decided it was the day. She got in that mini van (after Tob backed it out of the driveway) and drove 5 mins to church. She did give herself a little foot massage after but did great. Kiki said it was exciting but a bit scary :) Gotta love kids! Thank you for your continued prayers and don't stop. It's been the sustaining power through this whole experience.

Tim is gone again for 7 more days and then won't be traveling again till the New Year (thank God!!). Prayers for strength for both my sisters, the kids, and Tim as they push through (and Tob plans her wedding that will be here in 3 weeks).

We love you all and thank God for you!

October 30, 2012

Havah's getting out and about more this week but still has bad pain. Keep up the prayers for her spirits and body. Tim is still gone and it's hard for all four of them. The kids are doing a great job taking care of Havah though (as you can see in the picture below). XXOO

October 25, 2012- celebrate!

We all have to shout a celebratory 3 cheers because yesterday was a monumental day... Havah wore shoes!!! And socks! This is a big day for her. Up to now she had only worn slippers and flip flops which both hurt. She did hurt pretty bad by the end of the day but it was a big accomplishment and she wanted to share her excitement.

October 21, 2012

It's been a little while since our last update and 10 weeks since this all happened. Havah is definitely in a better spot now but it's proved to be hard in different ways.

The nerve medicine she's on has begun to help with the pain but... the major downside of the meds are dizziness, blurred vision, nausea, cotton mouth, and the fact that it takes about 1 1/2 hours to kick in.

Another hard thing is that everywhere she goes people are being so nice asking about her leg/foot but the question, "How did you hurt your foot?" is heart wrenching. This injury is not a daily reminder of the pain of losing a child, it's every minute.

Please pray with us that God will heal this nerve quicker. She is stuck between the past and the future. She desperately wants to move forward but is trapped in the nightmare. There is SO much to be thankful for and she is.

Thank you for your faithfulness to pray, check up on her, sending $, gift cards, meals... It's been the grace needed to function with 2 kids & a busy schedule.

A major goal of her's is to drive again. Please pray this will happen soon! Pray for Tim and the family as he goes away for almost 2 weeks this next trip. Pray for strength Tobreah as she steps up everyday to take care of Havah's childcare business, Kiki & Zeke, and Havah while planning her upcoming wedding. And for all that support them. Thank you isn't even enough but thank you!! XXOO

A text I got from Havah this week-
"I read this yesterday in my devotional book...We should never give ourselves the freedom to doubt God or his eternal love and faithfulness towards us in everything."

September 30, 2012

Havah & her toothless wonder

Havah went to the ultrasound appointment on her leg on Monday and a nerve doctor on Wednesday. They pretty much both gave her the same results- wait for it to get better. She's glad nothing is abnormally wrong but she's tired of that answer. 

Just wait is what they told her this entire journey! The baby has extra fluid at his neck at the 12 week ultrasound and it could be Down Syndrome or Trisomy 13 or 18 but just wait. The baby has a hole in his heart after the 16 week ultrasound and his hands seem to be clenched, just wait. The blood test came back positive for Trisomy 18 and he may not live to delivery, but just wait. That's been the theme and my sister and Tim have been so gracious throughout it all depending on the Lord and trying to stay hopeful. Now is no different and the Lord is teaching them each things through this next chapter but it is very taxing and discouraging at times that the recovery has taken so long. 

This next month is going to be interesting for them and honestly hard. Tim is going to be out of town almost the entire month. Tobreah will be taking on a lot more responsibility and we are hoping that Havah will be able to do more.

We can't thank you enough if you have brought them meals. If you have it on your heart, please sign up to bring a dinner in October. This relieves so much pressure for them.

You can click here to go to this website take Them A Meal.com

Hav & handsome Zekey

September 23, 2012

Hey friends! Thank you for your continued prayers and support for Havah and family. We all continue to heal with her as the weeks go into months from the date of this traumatic event. God is so faithful to do that and bring peace when needed. Church was so awesome today as the Lord ministered to all of us. The kids are doing great and are established into this new season: soccer, elementary school, and Awana. This is all awesome & hard for her at times since her mobility and energy are limited.

She is so done with this pain and the Dr has decided to check for artery flow. Tomorrow morning she will have an ultrasound on her leg & foot.

A special thanks to all you meal bringers: from close friends to friends we haven't seen in years! Tim says he couldn't have gotten through the past weeks with out the dinners. The need is still there for those of you who feel that you want to do that.

Thank you, thank you! XXOO

September 17, 2012

From my sister:

September 8, 2012

Today is the first day of the soccer season and Havah will be there (without a walker)! It's crazy but I can't even type that without tears escaping my eyes. She has improved a little since our last update. Her hip is beginning to improve but her nerve pain in her foot is still intense. She'll be ok and then the next moment she'll be in tears and in excruciating pain. This makes planning or doing anything so impossible. She still can't sleep much at night and it's really taking its toll on her physically & emotionally. She REALLY wants to be able to drive & do some normal things. Tim has been doing everything for her and he is going to be out of town on business next week so extra prayers are needed for that too. She so desperately want to move forward.

Elisha would have been 4 weeks on Thursday. The loss is so real everyday to her and then milestones just amplify the pain. We can make his life count everyday as we share the faith of his parents and the Lord's faithfulness to bring peace, inner healing, and joy in such darkness. In all this trauma and chaos, God is real and he has shown His love. He has shown it in presence, in the wisdom of doctors, in your prayers, dinners of love, thoughtful checks sent, kind words, etc... Elisha's life was shorter than most but it has stretched around the world in joining in prayers and love for the Felkers and my whole family. Havah and all of us send our thanks.

If you would please add a prayer for my dear uncle Skip, who's birthday is today. He suffered from a massive stroke 2 weeks ago & hasn't been showing much improvement. This is yet another big strain on all of us. He is married to my dad's sister Judy & has two adult kids who don't live locally.

We thank you so much for taking time to read this & being so committed to pray and ask how my sister is.

Love to you all, Kahanah

Here's Hav helping our little mischief & joy bringer Levi "water."

August 31- Summer's End and New Beginings

Well, summer is ending and school is beginning next week for all the kids and teachers but Havah's focus is still walking and sitting pain free. It's nice in a way to put this roller-coaster of a summer behind us but weird as time puts space between us and little Elisha. It's hard as a big sister & BFF to see my sister in pain missing her child and me missing that sweet face of a nephew I never got to know. We know we will hug and kiss one day but the loss is still so fresh that we all cry almost everyday for one reason or another. The Lord is so gracious though to let us keep my sister here for more loving, laughing, mothering, ministry, and fun. I'm thankful every day for her. We love you Sis.

Her MRI came back looking good, so thats awesome! Hav was hoping to be doing better by now: sleeping, driving, not in pain, but daily it is still a struggle. She is continuing with physical therapy & things are improving. She is doing so so much better and is very thankful to be alive but it's still very hard to be in so much pain. Please continue to pray for her right hip, ankle, and foot. Pray for peace and hope as their hearts heal from their loss. Thank you all for even reading this & all you've done during this time.

-K

August 26- 12:00 pm

Just heard from Tim that Havah did really good durning the MRI. Yay! They will probably get some results Tuesday.

August 22- 4:00 pm

Hey everybody. Havah is doing better of course but still in a lot of pain in her legs and she's getting really tired of not walking. She's still on some pain meds but they don't help very much. She is going to Physical Therapy and it's helping but the growth is slow. She really wants to be back to her old self already. If you know her, she's ready to move forward. The Dr has suggested a MRI to rule things out. Pray for her with that too. :( 

Her incision is still sore and as you mom's know who have had a c-section, it's takes time. She knows that. It all will take time but it's hard. She isn't sleeping or able to rest well so that makes it all worse. Add to all that missing little Eli... no words are needed for that one. 

Thank you for all the prayers, cards, baby sitting, donations, snacks, and dinners! It's been amazing and they have made all the difference. The F/R/S Family has been truely blessed by all of you.

August 19 2:00pm

Prayer Requests: the pain is Havah's legs is still very severe. Pray that the nerves & other damaged areas will repair quickly. She has so much trouble sleeping. Please pray she can get the rest she needs to recover.

August 18- Home

Havah is happily at home today! Thank the Lord. More updates tomorrow!

Take Them a Meal is up and running!

Our sweet friend Darlene has organized a meal schedule on a web site called takethemameal.com to help the Felkers out in the upcomming weeks. The reciepiant last name is "______" and password is "Havah", on this awesome page is all of the information people will need to help well, bring them a meal :)

You can click here to go to this website take Them A Meal.com

August 17- Great News!

We have heard from the doctors that Havah is scheduled to go home tomorrow around noon!! She is so excited! She is walking a bit today & the main prayer for her body is healing for her right foot and legs. We do not want her falling at home! Also, we want her platelets need to keep rising. Thx!

Psalm 103:1-5
1 Let all that I am praise the Lord; with my whole heart, I will praise his holy name. 2 Let all that I am praise the Lord; may I never forget the good things he does for me. 3 He forgives all my sins and heals all my diseases. 4 He redeems me from death and crowns me with love and tender mercies. 5 He fills my life with good things. My youth is renewed like the eagle’s.

August 17- Friday 9:45 am

Although Havah is feeling much better in general she had another very hard sleepless night due to leg pain. As some of the physical pain is subsiding the emotional weight of the situation is starting to press in hard. Please be praying for her continued physical healing, specifically her nerves in her leg, and continue to really press in for emotional healing and God's peace and love to flood my sweet sister's heart and mind. Thank you all for you're prayers, they're being heard by God and felt by all of our family.

August 16th-2:30pm

Havah is doing even better today. Her leg is still giving her a lot of pain :( but she can move it a bit more today. She feels more like a recovering patient with some of her own clothes on today! She had a visit from her 2 kids since Zeke is feeling better. They are always good medicine! Keep up the prayers, she still needs it! Praying to go home soon. She's super ready to say peace out to that place!

August 15- Donation Inquiries

Hi there. Some people have been asking if they can send donations to the Felkers to help pay for taking care of things with Elisha and other expenses that may occur from this crazy experience. One way to do it is to send a check to their house and another way is to send the money through paypal to Tim's email account. If you send money through your bank account and click that it's a gift, it is free. If you use a debit or credit card it's 30 cents. 

They have no idea that people are asking to help in this way but I'm sure it will come in really handy. You can email me for their address (kahanah@hotmail.com) or email him to go through paypal (timfelker@fathershouseoc.org).

click to go to paypal

August 15- Attention Meal Helpers

Dear Friends of Havah & Tim,

Havah is possibly coming home from the hospital this Friday! We want to help as the family grieves the loss of their baby Elisha and Havah heals physically from her C-section and her critical situation in ICU. We will be helping with meals starting on Saturday, August 18th. My goal is that a meal will come every other day.

They love all foods and prefer: whole grain, whole wheat, lots of veggies/fruit and light on meats and cheese.

Do you want to help? If you feel it on your heart to drop food, order them them a meal, or send money for a meal. You can click here to go to this website take Them A Meal.com
or email me at darlenedawn@sbcglobal.net & I'll sign you up.

Remember, Havah will still be in recovery when she makes it home so no visiting unless Tim or Havah directly tell you she's ok for one. Thanks again and in advance for all your help!

Thank you,
Darlene Browning
Care Core Cooks Crew Chief
The Father's House

Love in Action and Truth

August 15- 10:00 am

Havah is doing so much better today even though she had a rough night. The pain her legs are most likely a good sign of healing but it's super uncomfortable & hurts. Pray for it to get bearable so she can walk & sleep well. Thanks!

As you can see in the picture- her humor has returned!! Our girl with the risk bracelet.

August 15-Wednesday 8am

 Havah had a really rough night, slept for maybe 3 hours total. Lots of pain in her right leg and abdomen. She is getting very tired physically and emotionally so please keep up the prayers for God's continued strength,  peace an healing. XO

August 14 Tuesday-10:15pm

Havah was able to stand for just a quick moment and sit in a regular chair today. Her body is incredibly sore, she says she feels like she got hit by a bus. Lungs are clearing out well, and she even ate half a turkey sandwich today, and they may release her as early as friday!!! She thanks everyone so much for their love, support and prayers; and says keep them coming :)

August 14 12:00pm

Havah is in a lot of pain today and very uncomfortable. Please pray for her. Also little Zeke has a fever & therefore can't see his mama. Pray he'll heal quickly & none of the rest of us catch it. XXOO

August 14- 10:00pm Out of ICU

Havah has graduated to a recovery room! She is still in a lot of pain, exhausted, and her blood levels are recovering but low. Her legs are still weak but recovering. She says thank you for all the prayers & love!

August 13- Monday 10:30am

The great news keeps on coming :)
Hemoglobin and Platelets are up, coughs are starting to be a little more productive; but keep up the prayers on that one. Still having trouble with her right foot but getting some more movement.

She is moving to a new room (out of the ICU) today and we know how much everyone loves her, but no visitors yet, she is still very tired, we'll keep people updated on that. Pray for the care to be as great for her as it was in the ICU!

Thanks again for the overwhelming amount of prayers and love, they're incredibly appreciated :)
XO

August 12 7:30pm

We are thrilled to announce that the yucky neck main line is out!!! Yay! She's so relieved. She couldn't really even turn her head or lay comfortably with it in. She also got to eat a little today & seems to have a little more energy. Her oxygen in up to 100 so she may have the oxygen tubes out. Praise the Lord, thank you & keep praying for her & the family.

August 12 1:00pm

Her playlets are going up! Her hemoglobin is down. Thank you for the outpouring of love & prayers. It's been amazing.

Isaiah 41:10 10 Don’t be afraid, for I am with you. Don’t be discouraged, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you. I will hold you up with my victorious right hand.

August 12- Sunday 9:30am

Havah has been able to move her legs on her own this morning which is a very exciting! Please keep praying for her lungs to clear out and blood pressure to continue to stabilize :)

August 11- From Our Dad:

The past few days have been a remarkable testimony of God's love. Havah has continued to show improvement, taking one giant leap after another. As we go through this ordeal I am struck by God's wonderful creation, our human bodies are. From conversations with the doctors the systems that kept Havah alive were on "high alert" and the other systems were put on "pause". Her kidneys started sooner than expected, her oxygen usage improved so rapidly that they removed the breathing apparatus sooner than expected, but I must remember our first conversation with the anesthesiologist in the ICU when he told us to be patient. Right now she needs to start producing her own red blood cells again, and in God's creation and in His time, with continued prayer support it will come. I find that the rapid recovery has driven me to expect a more rapid recovery, yet I know that I CAN ONLY give this to the Creator. He has proven Himself true and I BELIEVE He will continue to do so. For those of you that are unaware, Elisha had a genetic condition called Trisomy 18, that affects the 18th chromosome and is not something he would ever grow out of. Tim and Havah chose to give this little guy a chance to live as long as he could. In conversations today, and in FB responses by you, we have already seen and felt the dramatic love and care from our family and friends to us, our family, and friends. Elisha has opened an outpouring of love and unity in his short time on Earth. Chick

August 11 4:00pm The Big Kids

Havah got to see her kids today. That was really great! She's just so weak bc of the blood issue and uncomfortable laying there. Please pray for that. Couple more days in ICU. The nurses, doctors, and staff are still really great.

Also, her blood pressure is doing great. Keep those prayers coming!

A T and an h (for Tim and Havah) out of cereal that 6 year old K found at breakfast.
She held them in her hand all day .

August 11th 3:00pm

Havah doing well but really tired today. The Dr's are very happy about her "remarkable" recovery. Her blood count levels were a little low but it's from the blood transfusion- very normal. On average it takes about a week for it to get back to normal. Why not pray it happens quicker? Her legs are moving a little better today. Blood pressure meds are still out & pray for it to stay like that. She can drink water today! Pray for the extra fluid to leave her body. Thank you, thank you.

August 10 9:00pm

She's going to have to have a CT scan soon cuz her legs don't have much movement - especially the right one. She can feel & wiggle her toes. They say worst case is blood clots in her spinal column (he doesn't think it is but wants to be conservative). It could be stressed nerves, the c-section, fatigue or something. Please pray for that & her blood pressure to stabilize cuz they had to put her on meds for it again & they don't want to take out the neck line without good blood pressure & she really wants it out.

Updated: Ct scan came back negative for blood clots. Keep praying for her blood pressure & Tim & the kids too. God's presence is so there. All the prayers are felt & obviously working. She looks really good.

August 10 7:45pm

She's doing great. Blood pressure is a little low & they are keeping a bunch of iv's in just in case (that she hates). she's got meds for the surgery wound & throat is killing her. She can barely swallow. Keep those prayers everywhere coming for her grieving process & physical healing.

She is conscious enough at times to know what happened & to understand what's going on in the present.

She is sad & grieving about Elisha but she said she wasn't scared or fearful during the experience..

Thank The Lord Of Heaven & Earth!!!

August 10- 2:30pm

Lamentations 2:20-24
I will never forget this awful time,
as I grieve over my loss. Yet I still dare to hope when I remember this: The faithful love of the Lord never ends!*
His mercies never cease. Great is his faithfulness; his mercies begin afresh each morning. I say to myself, “The Lord is my inheritance; therefore, I will hope in him!”

YOUR PRAYERS ARE WORKING!!! As of this moment (12:50pm) Havah is doing remarkably better. They were able to remove a balloon in her. Her labs are looking better & better. As of this morning her white blood cell count was a little high but but much better. Also she is breathing on her own at 60% (but she still has the breathing tube in) but they are working towards taking that out today. She is still retaining fluids but her kidneys are working now but they have alot of work to do so keep praying for them to work properly.

As this is being written her breathing tube has been taken out...Praise God! Keep Praying!!! She is doing remarkably better...they are lowering sedation and a little more conscious of others in the room.

Please continue to pray. And if you are coming to the hospital to visit you will not be able to see Havah but will be able to sit with others in the waiting room and share your love, support, prayers and thoughts with those there. Also there is a journal that is sitting in the waithing room that the family would love for you to write in so they can give it to Havah when she is well enough to read it...Please share your love, thoughts, prayers and encouragement with Havah in the journal.

Although many of us know the whole family & each other so well and are such close friends that we are like a family, PLEASE GIVE THE FAMILY SPACE...physically, mentally and emotionally. If the doctors come out to give them reports please let the family meet wtih the doctors and allow them to decide what information to share with others that you can pass along to others who are praying. God bless you all and keep up the prayers they are sustaining all right now.
Please pass this along!!!

Turned a Corner- August 9 @ 7:00pm

Havah is stable and showing signs of improvement. They think she will be here for at least a week. Tim just left to go be with his kids and get some rest. She is still in ICU in critical condition but is breathing at 80% oxygen on her own. No one but immediate family is allowed in to see her. Thank you for your prayers & PLEASE continue to pray for her healing & for the family.

August 9- A Little Bit of History- 4:30 pm

"Your ways are higher than our ways and the plans that you have made are good and true."

Havah was induced Wednesday afternoon and had a very long, painful labor process. At around 11am our wonderful doctor decided to do an emergency C-Section for Havah's health. Tim and Havah welcomed beautiful Elisha Richard (5 lbs 3oz) on August 9, 2012 at 11:15am. Baby Elisha and was not alive (due to Trisomy 18-an extra 18th chromosome) at the time of birth. The doctors believed he most likely went to be with Jesus on Wednesday or even Tuesday night.  *Havah remembers a yucky feeling that things weren't right since she hadn't really felt him on Wednesday.

During the C-Section procedure. The surgery went fine in itself until Havah was found to have a concealed placenta abruption (happens in 1% of pregnancies worldwide). She was then found to have DIC (Disseminated intravascular coagulation)- her blood wasn't clotting. Her platelet count got down to around 12 (normal is 140). They gave her blood transfusions, platelets, and had to intubate her with a breathing tube. She was transferred in critical condition to the ICU in respiratory distress due to pulmonary edema. Her lungs were filling with fluid, even with the breathing tube in. The doctors were looking at the possibility dialysis if her body could not eliminate the fluids that were pumped into her body to get it to start clotting.

The situation is extremely serious at this point, but we believe God will intervene as we continue to ask for complete healing on her behalf. In addition, please pray for Pastor Tim and the rest of the family. Between the loss of baby Elisha and Havah’s current condition they need our prayerful support.

Please pass this message on so we can ensure everyone is aware. Even if people receive the same message numerous times we want to make sure everyone knows and is praying.

Havah and Mom at her baby shower.